Embracing the Cough

Were does time go to! Some days I find myself counting down the hours to nap time and then to bed time, and yet then I blink and my babes are 14 months and 11 months.

So my 14 month old is a smarty pants that is for sure. she has figured out how to unlock my Iphone and I thought that she would not get it, however I think she was paying close attention to me when I would play with it and was working on figuring it out. Her bottom 18 month old molars have finally cut through. I am one happy mama about that. It means less middle of the night wakes up to a screaming and in pain baby girl. As a mother I feel helpless when I know I have done everything I can to help ease the pain and swelling and yet they still are in pain and it still hurts. This past month of colds was like that. Colds and teething, AHHHHHHHH! However I am happy to say that I think we have turned the corner and we are all getting better.

Jaris, my 11 month old is doing amazing. He is pulling himself up to standing and now shuffling along the couch and moving from holding the couch to the ottoman all by himself! WOW talk about a proud mama!!!!!!!!!!! I love watching him and how proud he is of himself. He also can crawl up the stairs from our toy room to our living room. He still has trouble with the reverse, however we will take it one step at a time. These days our fears and worries about his abilities seem to have disappeared. Someone who were to meet him now would never know that there was a time we were fearful and worried that he would never be able to sit up, crawl, walk, talk etc. I thought I may never hear him say Mama, or Dada, and now we hear that all the time. God is good, God would be good even if Jaris was not able to do all these things. I may find it harder to say, however the truth is no matter what God is with us and holding us and loving us!

Jeral's knee is doing fantastic, so much so that he does the chores more than I do. Some days it is just easier and more time efficient if he does them. Yet I still get the odd chicken thinking morning while I am doing the chores.

I got really sick last week. Whatever the kids and Jeral had for the past month hit me hard, and I was coughing up a storm. However I learned something from being sick. Since the coughing hurt so much I tended to fight the coughing and thus extended the time I was cough two fold as well as the pain. If I would have embraced the coughing and just let it happen when it was happening, while it would have been extremely painful in the moment, the moment would have passed and the gunk in my chest would have come up and I would have then enjoyed a break from the coughing for a bit. Yet because I was stubborn thinking I could fight with the cough and win I extended the length of time it took for the gunk to come up as well as the pain. each little cough hurt almost as much as a big cough. Once I figured that out it was big coughs are welcome!!!!! Normally I am not one to ask God what can he teach me through being sick - I would rather medicate and feel great while being sick. This time was different, and while the lesson was taught through my being sick, it is more than just about me accepting getting a cold. This translates into everyday life. I am not one to accept something I do not like, I fight it and try my best to change it even if it is something that has already happened. Yet the key to moving on is moving through whatever is going on by accepting it, embracing it for what it is, and in many cases also talking about it and feeling the emotions attached to it with someone safe. I know I have a long way to go with this. Yet I am thankful for the little reminders by Jesus.

So we have hit 4 weeks of the kids being sick! So not fun, and that is a bit of an understatement. This past week Kenzie has been so not herself. Normally our little girl is all smiles and is not one to cuddle all day. This week she has spent a lot of time crying and basically just not sure what to do with herself. Getting her to eat has been hard, and getting her to drink anything has been even harder. I had to spoon feed her with the medicine dropper. She has wanted me to hold her and walk around, however if I sit down she starts crying, and well there is no way she wants me holding her brother when I am supposed to be holding her. I have spent many nights this past week walking around our house with her in my arms when everyone else is asleep. One night it was 3 hours of her screaming until she finally fell asleep from exhaustion. It sort of reminds me of a year ago when Kenzie was 7 weeks or so and she got a cold and then I got it and I basically walked around carrying her all day in my arms. if I sat down then to rock her she freaked out so I walked, plus walking meant I could breathe a bit myself.

Jaris has also been sick for the past 4 weeks. His disposition is a little different than Kenzie's, while she lets you know very vocally that she is upset and wants you to fix the problem for her. Jaris is a little vocal until mommy is holding him or daddy is holding him in just the right way. And what is the right way, well at night it seems to be skin to skin. The whole sucking snot out of their noses this is like world war 3 around here. It does not go over well at all. Funny how little babes do not like it and yet as an adult if the snot sucker worked on me I would totally use it when I am sick. Once he is all snuggled in with a soother if he can breathe enough to use it he is good to go. Both of them are coughing up a storm. Jaris has twice coughed up the biggest load of snot all over me. Yuck I know! I am at the point now where if the snot is running down both their noses and I am not in the vicinity of kleenex I just use my fingers and wipe it off on my jeans. Yep gross, I got it, however we are so used to snot in this house that I have left go of some of my princess ways and gotten back to my camp days when in that instant you make due with what you have. Yet with all of this sickness stuff going on it has been a treasure to watch Jaris and Kenzie keep developing and progressing in their abilities. Both are doing great in that department.

I look forward to the day when our family is no longer sick, and here is hoping that is soon!

Sleeping Beauties

My baby girl sound asleep! I guess the back pack was comfortable because even after I took it off and put it on the floor at Wendy's she stayed asleep. Well either it is comfy or she was just tired!

We stopped at my mom's house the other day and Jeral dropped me off while he went to sell our dodge diesel truck. Well I went into the kitchen for a moment and came out to see my son standing at the stairs. He crawled over and pulled himself up all by himself. Wow!!!! It was a proud mama moment!

Jeral and I recently bought back packs for taking the kids on hikes. Well we decided to test the back packs out right after we bought them and well this is Jaris all nice and comfy.



So Monday was Valentines Day and it sort of snuck up on me. I had a bit of a rough afternoon evening and when I got home from Kelowna this is what I walked into. Jeral had both babes in their high chairs, the lights were out and the candles were lit. Kenzie was saying Mama, and Jaris was babbling away and well I started crying! Oiy, not much of a crier, yet this definitely got me crying. I sure am a very blessed wife and mother!

So life lately, well we are still trying to get over the cold that hit our house a few weeks ago. We have had some long nights here, however I don't mind all the cuddles.

This is how I found Jaris a couple of days ago. he woke up at 5:30 am and would not go back to sleep so Jeral got up with his, and at about 9 am he got really quiet and when I turned around to see what was going on he was sound asleep, so I ran upstairs to grab he camera. He is so adorable! I love being his mama!

My little girl! I love how she loves teddy bears and soft things. just like her forever mama! I still sleep with a teddy bear or two! And yes she is holding a nice big fat licorice! It helps on the days when nothing seems to work with teething.

I have been wanting to post for a few days, however life with two babes and being sick with the cold that keeps on giving has hindered this. So what is new around here!

We are on round two of the cold that keeps giving! So not fun. I think the kids are on the mend, however I am hoping that by tomorrow my cold miraculously is gone because I have an appointment with and ENT Dr. to talk about my constantly congested nose! I really do not want him to think that the cold is the reason for it. Plus our barns are empty and we are hoping to have some time to do family things and that will not be as fun for me if I am sick!

Kenzie - all I can say is wow. Her walking has opened up a whole new world for her and I am constantly thinking she is in one place only to realize she is not! The other day I did not know she was behind me and I took a frying pan out of the cupboard to make her lunch and as I turned around I whacked her in the head. I felt awful! She is a pro at climbing up and sliding down stairs. We were at a friends house last night and Kenzie was going down the stairs backwards, and when she saw me coming to get her she started sliding even faster. She is a smartie pants my little girl!

Jaris - He is sitting up all on his own these days without the help of Mama! I was sitting on the rocking chair the other night and I had plunked Jaris down to play with a toy when he saw another toy so down to his stomach he went to crawl over and normally that is it he is on his back or stomach until one of us helps him sit up. Yet to my amazement I went in the the kitchen to grab something and when I cam back he was sitting up! Since then he seems to want to move non-stop and show off his sitting skills. I think for me watching him reach these milestones is all the more amazing because there was a time when we were legitimately not sure if he would ever be able to do something as simple as sitting up on his own. Now he crawls, he laughs, he smiles, he talks, he makes eye contact, holds his own bottle, picks up food and feeds himself, and sits up on his own, among other things.

I am a lucky mama to have two such amazing babes. Periodically I think back to what life was like a year ago and I did that last week. A year ago I had a tiny newborn baby girl and was 7.5 months pregnant and sick. Life was a complete fog. Now a year later, life is not a total fog anymore. I am sick yet again :( , however this time I am pretty sure the congestion will not stay for the next 6 weeks or so!!!!!!

Walking, Crawling, and Food Throwing

Sorry I have not posted in a while. We have all been sick and life with sick kids is so different than life when it was just Jeral and I and one of us got sick. I must admit it seems that everything on the outside world stops when little babes are not feeling well. It has been a week and a bit here and just when I thought that kids were getting better they both have developed a cough. Add to that insomnia on mama's part and wow life has to stand still just to some what function. Oh well!

So what is new?

Kenzie is walking all over the place and a whole new world has opened up. There was lost of freedom in crawling however the freedom of walking wow! I must admit it is a little surreal to see her walking up to me or to turn around and have her standing there and i had no clue she was there! Yet it is also the best feeling in the world to have her hear me come in the house when I get home from my weekly trip to Kelowna and she comes run/walking down the hallway with her arms open wanting me to pick her up for a great big hug. I am a lucky mommy that is for sure. She is starting to say more words, or let me correct that we are starting to understand her a little bit better! I love listening to her talk and babble aways. However i love her laugh. When she and Jaris get going it is the best thing in the world. Okay with kids there are a lot of best things in the world!!!!

Jaris is getting better at commando crawling, he is getting fast! Put the right motivation in front of him and wow watch him go! Yes a bottle is normally the right motivation, however he also has his favorite toy, and both kids love books, so put a book out of arms reach and he will go for it! i think he is going to be a reader as he gets older! He is talking lots and definitely knows when mommy or daddy have taken something away that he wants. It is also fun to watch him watch his sister. I know he so wants to keep up with her and follow her, yet his little muscles just are not able to keep his big body going at the same rate. However one day those muscles will get bigger and wow i know I will be running non-stop.

As parents we are trying to figure out how to correct and guide our babes the best we can. Kenzie is in a stage of throwing everything off of her tray when she is finished eating or just to get a reaction out of us. Telling her ta-ta or no does not seem to work for throwing the food. However ta ta works rather well for other things.With the food thing She just looks at us and laughs, which is so cute, and so hard not to laugh at, however we are trying to teach her that there are other ways of telling mommy and daddy that she is done with out makig such a huge mess. Jaris doesn't throw food yet. However he may never since he loves to eat so much. The bottle on the other hand has been chucked a few times. I guess we as parents are getting out of the stage where everything is so cute and we do not need to worry about correction and guidance as much to now needing to think about it more. I am glad though that Jeral and I are on the same page with this. I think it would be very hard to be on separate pages. The benefit of going through the adoption process it made us stop, think, and talk about how we want to guide and correct our children when that is needed. Parenting is not all hugs, kisses, and snuggles!

Jeral - he has a cortisone shot last week and his knee is doing better. I still want to do most of the chores however it is nice knowing that some days I can ask him to do them so I can spend a little more time with my babes! I know not being able to be as mobile as he would have liked to be was taking a toll on him. He likes to be active and I know he wants to be an active dad and the thought of not getting to go on hikes, or go on bike trips with our family was not a happy thought. However all seems good for now and we are thankful that no knee replacement is needed as of now.

Me- well what can I say? Life is moving along some days are great and others are not so great that is life! I am thankful that as the babes are getting older taking care of them seems to be easier, or maybe it is just different. So there you have it, our life as of late! With that I say have a great day!

Being 32

Well it official, I am 32 years old. The other day I was thinking that I am now closer to 40 than I am to 20 oiy!

So what did we do - Jeral took me out and got me my new Iphone 4. So excited for that. We aslo went out for dinner and saw a movie and the whole time I wondered how the babes were doing. I have never been gone from both of them for 7 hours so it was a stretch and yet it was nice to be on a date with the man I love and adore.

This past year of my life has been so full of so many experiences.

• I became a mother twice over through different ways, and both equally as beautiful as they were challenging. Kenzie and Jaris are my miracles. The ups and downs of sleep deprivation, just when you think the schedule is all worked out something changes.
• I got to be at the birth of my niece Madalyn - which was an amazing experience.
• I have gotten to see first hand how much joy both my babes bring to not only us, also to others around us.
• Jumped for joy when Kenzie rolled over, crawled, said Mama and new what she was saying, and walked for the first time. Oh and i better not forget all the times she has crawled up on my lap to read a book or just to give me kisses.
• Kenzie's Adoption was finalized, and she also had her first Birthday all in this past year of my life.
• Jaris - we had a big scare when we were not sure why he was so floppy, and then he turned it all around and we have gotten to watch him get stronger, and smile, and talk/babble - starting to crawl the way he does. Sitting up and playing.
• Lost a bunch of weight in one day thanks to giving birth :) Only to then over the next few month put a bunch of weight back on :( I will get it off in time!
• A relationship of approximately 4 years with one therapist ended and a new relationship with another one began.
• Enjoying a summer with babes and going swimming with them. They love to swim.
• Going to Soccer games with the big beast stroller and having everyone fall in love with our babes.
• Getting constantly asked if we have twins and finally coming to a place of just being able to say yes, instead of telling everyone the long, yet amazing story.
• Taking the kids out in the snow on a sled - I think we have years of that a head of us.
• Starting to do chores in the chicken barns again - not sure if I saw that one coming!

There are lots of other experiences that have been amazing and as I look back I think that there are only 2 big regrets.

• Regret number one - not listening to my inner feelings when I felt that we needed to stay home from a family function. Listening and staying home would have been the wise thing to do. I can tell you that will never happen again.
• Regret number 2 - being to afraid to tell someone I care about how much I was really hurt by certain things. Instead I pushed away and said I had said all I needed to say. Oh well such is life and the way it goes. Some things are easier to do than others. Maybe one day I will get to a point where I will be able to say everything or maybe one day I will get to the point where it does not really matter anymore.

So yeah it has been a full year. Mostly in part due to my amazing little babes. I am not sure if I really knew who life altering and busy I would be with two babes at once. However I would say that this last year for 31-32 has been one of the most challenging, heart breaking, and yet joyous and amazing years of my life. So with that I will say I am looking forward to the future!

LIfe as Of Late

Tuesday this past week both kids had dr.'s check ups and well my 9 month old son tipped the scales at 25lbs, 11 oz., and he is 31.5 inches long. Kenzie weighed in at 21 lbs and I do not remember how long she is. When Kenzie and Jaris stand next to each other Jaris is taller. Jaris also had physio yesterday and he started showing off for the ladies. At one point they were asking me if he was able to get up on all fours and start rocking back and forth, and I said nope not yet. Well no joke less than a minute after that Jaris was up on all fours and rocking and talking and showing off. I am so proud of both my babes.

I have started doing the chores on our farm which I am enjoying. Jeral has a really bad knee and some days can barely walk on it and since the barns are 350 feet in length and each barn is walked four times, there is no way his knee can hold out so I after about 4 years have gone back into the barns, and I liking it. The time to think is great. I may not give him back the barns after his knee feels better.

We are looking forward to a family trip in February when our birds have shipped. Once again the trip is to Abbotsford and Vancouver! We tend not to be too creative. Plus traveling to where family and friends are makes the trip great for the kids and we get that little bit of extra helping hands with them. As both of them get older it makes traveling harder, well the nights are more difficult however that is life! And give it a few years and life and traveling will be easier!

Life Lately

Kenzie has decided it is time to color, so I guess I need to order soy based crayons so that way when she decides to eat them I know that it is okay.

Showing off his skills for mama! Jaris was commando crawling and rolling all over the living room floor this afternoon.

A birthday present for a friends son. I have started making blankets again. I made a fuzzy one for Kenzie with flowers and decided I would try a teddy bear one for my friends son who also had his first birthday party recently.

Getting ready to go for a walk with Mommy and Auntie Karen!

Kenzie out like a light on our way to Kamloops on Christmas day! She was so adorable we took a picture!

Jaris and daddy on Christmas day before we went over to Mark and Jodi's for lunch! We had a great time hanging out with them and the Baylis family.

Our Christmas at home with the kids. I went crazy and got them lots this year! Kenzie loves sitting and relaxing in soft chairs so we got her a very soft chair to lounge in and she decided it was nicer to lounge this way than the way the chair is meant to be sat in! She is a smart cookie my daughter!

Jaris and one of his new toys!

Jaris pulling at the paper. Really we could have given them boxes and paper and they would have had a great Christmas!

I think I managed to find every Fisher Price Surprise Pop Up Block and by it for them

Christmas Eve and Jaris in his suit! Looking snazzy my son, looking snazzy!

Ready to go to Church for the Christmas Eve Service. This was the best shot I could get, before the kids rebelled . I love the dress we had for Kenzie I even had a head band thingy for her to wear however I had to settle for a clip because she kept taking the head band with a flower off!

So I know I have been not blogging as much lately. I have preferred to spend time snuggling with my babes. I guess I am saying that things are going to be slowing down from here on in. I know that my friends and family who read the blog enjoy seeing pictures of the kids and getting to watch them grow and develop, and yet I am feeling the need to spend less time on the computer and more time with my babes and husband (that is once the babes are in bed).

So what is new for us?

Jaris - we are so proud of him, he is such an amazing little boy. He is commando crawling these days. Basically when he wants something he pushes with his feet and uses his arms to drag himself. This was a goal that was set for him to meet in a 5 - 6 month time range and he did it in 2 months!!!!!!!! He is talking up a storm theses days. Not sure what he is saying however we know he is talking and trying to tell us stories. My favorite time of the day with him is right after he wakes up from his nap and he is making noise to let me know it is time to get him. When I walk into the room and say mama is here he stops whatever he is doing and pushes up on his arms to get himself as high as he can go to see me and gives me the best smile in the world. My heart melts and I am a mush ball! Jaris still is not sleeping through the night, however I can hardly complain about that since Jeral chooses to get up for Jaris 4:30 am feed and then snuggles with him until 7:30 am.

Kenzie - she is walking by herself these days. She still is faster at scootching, however she is taking more steps on her own every day. I know that once she is walking I will be running non-stop after her, however I think it will be fun most days. Plus I need to start running around. Kenzie has also started to crawl up to me just to snuggle for a second or two, give me a few kisses and then go right back to playing. I love that! Once again something in the day to melt my heart. Kenzie for the most part is sleeping through the night!!!!! Yeah for that, since I am the one who gets up with her normally, and yet I do not mind the odd night that I need to go snuggle and cuddle for a little while.

Jeral and I had our 4th anniversary. Wow 4 years where has the time gone? This year we chose to spend our anniversary with Jeral's sister and her family. They were in Oliver for a while so we went and joined them. Honestly it was the perfect way to spend it - with people we love plus the extra hands with the kids is always a bonus.

Jeral just bought a new to us farm truck. It is a 2007 Chev Silverado, with a full crew cab. Jeral knee has been giving him problems so it was time to retire the big standard diesel. I am looking forward to driving it too! Seriously in the past year we have bought Van, Jeral bought a motor cycle, and now a truck. Oiy an expensive year it has been.

Me, well what can I say I am going to be 32 soon. Wow that used to seem so old and now it just doesn't any more. My biceps get a good work out every day carrying both Kenzie and Jaris around. This afternoon after I got Jaris I was walking out of his room with him in my arms thinking man having one kid would be so easy, and yet I went straight to Kenzie's room and scooped her up in my other arm and then carried them both down stairs at the same time. Yeah that is an extra 50 pounds of weight, and i could not imagine life without either babe in my arms. In February I see a ENT Specialist to see if there is anything that can be done to help me breathe better.