Calgary Trip

We are going to be very sad to leave tomorrow!  We arrived in Calgary on Friday evening to a throng of squealing children!  All three of our children and both of my sister's children we giddy with delight and enthusiasm.  I love how much our children have grown to love each other and I know that when we leave tomorrow we will all be very sad.

Another great bonus of this trip is that the dad's and mom's traded off days.  On the Saturday Jeral and Chris got to go out and enjoy just chilling together, while Jocelyn and I watched the children.  We managed to get all five kids out of the house for a bit of an adventure at the McDonalds Play Place.  Jaris even went up in the equipment until he tried to stand up and smashed his head.  At that point he screamed so loudly that another mom ran, ripped her shoes off and went inside the equipment.  However when she got to Jaris before I could the screaming got louder and she turned to me and said I think I scared him.  Yep I am pretty sure you did, and that is okay!

Sunday my sister and I got to leave the men with the children, and we went out for a lovely lunch, some shopping, and a movie.  It was so nice to get to just hang and do sister things together, and surprisingly we even like similar movies!  While we were shopping we looked at each other, then smiled because we both realized that all of our shopping was for our children and not for us.

Jeral and Chris took the kids sledding Sunday night and they had a blast.  In all honestly we were not sure how Jaris would do, yet he loved it and had some much fun.  So I think we have found another amazing activity for him to enjoy!  When they got home with the kids Chris had said that he expected Jaris to be the weakest link, yet he was the strongest one out there.  I know the comment was meant to be encouraging, and I am choosing to sit in the reality that my son loves sledding and blew everyone else away with his skills in this area.  Yet I also find it it hard to hear that my son was expected to be the weakest link.  Maybe it was just the way things were said, and that is what bothers me.  I know that when children have disabilities others often expect less of them, and I will admit that I am guilty of this myself.  While I am Jaris mother and I know what he is capable of better than anyone else, I also know he is capable of being encouraged gently to go beyond what he is already doing. I also know that the best time to encourage him to go beyond his limits is when he is in a relaxed and anxiety free place.

I also loved watching the children play together.  They had so much fun.  All four of the oldest were interacting and playing dress up.  At one point Tyson and Jaris came down stairs asking for help to find the second pirate hat so they could be pirates together.  We also had a first happen - Jaris and Tyson were playing just the two of them and Kenzie and Mady were playing just the two of them.

Now we are home and while we are thankful to be home, we are sad that we had to leave.  Coming home means doing lots of laundry and tidying up the house.  The children are already telling me how much they miss their cousins and that they can't wait to see them and luckily we get to see them in 3.5 weeks.  So until then we will get the house ready for the big Pauls' Christmas in a few weeks, and I will keep setting up for Christmas!

Fall Family Photos

In Mid October we went to Davison Orchards and met up with Heather and Bernie from Captured Memories Photography for a mini photo shoot.  We had fun and for the most part so did our children. As you can tell we still struggle to get a family photo with all of our children looking and smiling at the camera, yet oh well.  My children are priceless to me!

Family of 5!  Sure do love my family!

Happy Boy going down the slide!

I love this photo because of the way Jaris is standing almost as though he is going to take on the world and look after his older sister and younger brother!

These two are in league with each other.  The had been together since Kenzie was 3 months old and Jaris was born - they do not remember a life without each other and I honestly know that they would be lost if something ever happened to either one of them.

My cutie pie!

We tried to get a few of Jeral in - however for the most part I was the one in the dirt with the kids!

We prayed and waited for God to send us and angel and that angel is this little girl!  Love you baby girl!

Future Farmer sitting behind this tractor

I love how he is shoeless here!  Keeping shoes on this boy is hard, in part because he has very thick feet and in part because he is like me and prefers to be barefoot!

A mother and daughter shot!  I am such a lucky mama!

Jaris kept telling me that the tractor was stuck and asking me to help him get it out!  I will do anything for my boy!

Playing in the sand

So sweet, so innocent!

Umm, get away from me please stop trying to smoother me!!!!!! At least that is what I think his face is saying here!

Brotherly love!

Pumpkins

Like I said they do almost everything together!

Well there you have it, just some of the photos that we got!  Jeral is putting Hayden to bed and Kenzie is asleep, while Jaris lays in our bed trying to fall asleep.  I must say having my office back is a great bonus.  I am still technically in the room with them, so they don't get up, and yet I still have my space.  We just finished putting my office back together this week.  For the past 5 months it has been in disarray from the renos we did.  I finally gave my wonderful hubby a deadline, or else we would have to hire someone else to finish because this was taking to long.  I can guarantee that if it was his office, it would have been finished long ago.  Oh well all that matters now is that I finally have my own sacred space. I still have a few finishing touches and this will come soon.

Wishing for a Safe Haven

I love this photo of Kenzie with her cousin James from this summer!  My kids absolutely adore their cousins, and I feel so blessed that my children and so loved by all of their cousins.  They truly are amazing amazing group of young people.

Jeral and I have been talking lately about how blessed we are and how at times we long to just have a "normal" life.  We constantly have people coming and going from our home.  We are constantly consulting with others as to what is the best path for us to take as a family.  I know that many people thrive off of that and would love to have the "extra" help and input.  We are just in a place of input over load.  If money was no object and if we would not miss our families so much I think we would pack up and buy a tiny deserted island to live out the rest of our days as a family.  It would be our haven from constantly being asked to justify every decision we make.  I know that to some who live in countries where the government does not help with funding for the treatment of children with autism I may sound ungrateful.  That is not my intent.  I know how fortunate we are to be able to provide the therapies that my son needs - I also know first hand that the funding we get does not cover it all - we are paying for some of his therapies personally.  I guess I am grieving the life I had thought we would have when we had children and how drastically things have changed this year.

I decided that I was going to start attending the Bible Study at our church again, and then I decided I am not going too.  While I know many LOVE doing Beth Moore Studies, and I am sure she is a lovely person there is something about her that drives me bonkers.  While I do crave connecting with other women (in a setting that does not revolve around my  children, and is less anxiety producing) I realized ladies Bible Study is not where I am at and I am totally okay with that.

One more rant for the day.  There has been an article making it way around Facebook, about Jenny McCarthy Being Dangerous.  While I may not agree with everything that she had said in regards to vaccinations being the cause of Autism, and that the Gluten and Dairy Free diet is a cure for Autism etc., I am very tired of people picking on her.  I think that we are forgetting that she is a mother, and as a mother when your child is diagnosed with a disorder such as Autism you will turn over every stone and look behind every corner to find help for your child and to find answers.  There is no rhyme or reason as to why some children like my son are born with their brain pathways wired different than the rest of typical society.  It is a mystery that I hope and pray will be solved in my life time and that we will be able to help children like Jaris and so many others to a greater extent.  Instead of picking on her and borderline bullying her, try to remember that she is just a mom who wants to help her child.  Instead of judging, and offering sympathy, try empathy!  As a mother of a child who has Autism, I know first had the blessings my son is, and I know how I would give everything including my own life to help him make sense of this world that he lives in.  One that does not make sense to him all the time.  I know the research behind vaccinations and that for the most part science says there is no link between vaccinations and autism.  We tried the gluten free and dairy free diet and it was a bust for us.  I also know that I am curios and educated enough to research the latest fads/therapies for Autism, and that I so long to know why Jaris has to face this struggle.  So because of that I have grace and compassion for a woman who happens to be a celebrity, and who also is a mom.


Oh and just to note we did not put Hayden in the dryer, he climbed in himself.  Apparently he thinks it is the best place ever!

Playing Catch Up

Wow it is hard to believe that i have not posted anything since H's birthday.  I have started many posts and just have never finished them.  Yesterday we meet up with our friends and photographers Heather and Bernie at Davison Orchards for a mini photo shoot at the pumpkin patch.  I sure am blessed to have the family that I have.

So life lately has been busy!!!!!!!!!  Busy feels like an understatement.  I do not want to think how crazy busy we will be once the kids start extra-curricular activities.  I feel as though we are going full tilt already.  

Kenzie is loving preschool and thriving there!  She loves her teachers and tells them every school day how much she missed them.  I love the little crafts she brings home every from preschool and I love that she is so social.  The only time she does not want to go to preschool is when Jaris' OT comes to the house to play once a month.  Kenzie loves playing with her.  Kenzie is definitely not a baby any more.  She says that cutest and sometime most precocious things.  Lately she has been asking to have lots of mommy/daughter dates, and has decided she love Chinese food!  So I am frequently asked to take her to the mall so we can have lunch there!  I can hardly believe that in just over 2 months my little girl will be 4 years old.  We are reminding Kenzie that once she turns 4 we will be moving her back to her bedroom for night time.  While she loves being a big girl when it comes to sleeping she insists that she needs to cuddle with mommy all night long.  I do love snuggles, and I am also ready to have my space at night back!

Jaris is having a tough time emotionally with his school.  He is whipping through things at a fast rate so we know he is capable of completing the tasks set out before him.  He just fights with us in the mornings before session.  Normally I can hold him and his huge puppy dog on my lap and gently remind him that mommy needs to leave soon, and i can go.  However we had some really rough days that broke my heart.  I am thankful that after a talking with the supervisors we sorted some things out.  Unfortunately the agency and I did not get off to a good start when I was told by one of the BC's that Jaris needed to learn that when he cries no one will come to his rescue.  Fortunately I was able to talk things through with the supervisor and the BC apologized and they are willing to incorporate family time into Jaris' sessions.  While things got off to a rocky start, we are seeing Jaris grow and blossom.  I still have to bribe him to say,"I love mommy!"  Yet he is saying it now, which is something I never thought I would hear come out of his mouth.

Hayden affectionately called H at home is not a little baby anymore.  He is starting to walk, yet only when he wants to.  if we try to get him to walk he promptly sits down and crawls.  He loves all things soft and snuggly, and frequently goes after his sisters blanket while she sits all wrapped up in it.  We took the gate off the stairs a while ago because he is an expert climber!  He crawls up and to go down he lays on his tummy and gives himself a big push to slide down.  He is very fast! The only slightly scary part is when he decides to show off and stands on the edge of a stair while screeching in delight!  H has 14 teeth with 2 more cutting, so no wonder my amazing sleeper has decided to stop sleeping through the night!  He had another hearing test in September and he passed it with flying colors.  I am hoping that he is just going to be a slow talker.  So we will keep an eye on him.  I love that H still will snuggle before bedtime. Actually all three of our children snuggle with us and I feel very blessed that they do.

Jeral is doing well.  I am so blessed that he is so involved in the life of our children, and that he is so helpful.  I am truly fortunate and our children are lucky to have their daddy so involved in their lives.

Well this is our life!  Hopefully I won't go 2 months until I blog again.

Hayden is ONE

The birthday boys!

Opening Presents

I think the smile says it all. He is one happy boy!

Hanging out with Grandma Krahn

My mom, Grandma J made this amazing birthday cake or Hayden's party!  Thanks Mom!

Cousins!  My kids have the most amazing older cousins!!!!  I love that they have such great role models in their lives!!!!

One of the amazing young ladies who has on occasion baby sat the kiddos with their cousin Rachel. 

Hayden and Rachel. My kids LOVE their older cousins 

Hayden and his new ducky!

Hayden turned 1 this past Tuesday. The day before on Jeral's birthday we took the family to Kangaroo Creek to see the Kangaroos, after we went out for lunch, and finally we went to a water park. We had a great day celebrating the oldest member of our family an the youngest member of our family. On Hayden's birthday we just hung at at home and did the whole present thing and I made large cup cakes for dessert that evening!  Then this Saturday we had some famil ove or a party to celebrate Hayden's 1st birthday. 

This past year has been amazing and rough for us yet Hayden has been a constant joy. Looking at him now I find it hard to believe he ever was the 9 lbs newborn small baby that he was. Okay I know 9 lbs is not that small. Yet compared to 30 lbs that is tiny!  Hayden, you are a constant joy to our family. I have loved watching you change and grow into the little boy you are. I know beyond a shadow of doubt that you were created by God especially for our family. I love how connected you are o your older sister Kenzie and how th two of you giggle when you play together. I enjoy watching you try to do everything you older brother Jaris does an how intently you each all he does so ou can follow behind him.  I have loved all our snuggles and cuddles. While I am slightly sad that you want to be more independent I am thankful for every moment you just want mommy. I am thankful or the people God placed in my life before you were born who walked with me as I processed the things I needed to so I could successfully nurse you. Being able to nurse you was one of the greatest blessing about becoming your mama. 

My prayer for us still the same as it was the day you were born - that you will grow up the be a man after Gods own heart. That you will stand for what you believe in even when it goes against what is "popular" or what the majority of others say is right or true. I pray you will one day choose to follow God, and that you will know how much God truly loves you. I hope that you will live a long and full life, filled with love and adventures!

I Love you my son!  Thank you for making our family that much better!

Love, Mommy

 

Family Photo Shoot

I love his curly Hair!  So blessed to be his mama!

Almost 1 year old here.  This year went by so very fast!

So sweet and so just amazing.  She is one of the most sensitive and kind girls I know!  And I am her mama!!!!!!

My nephew and Niece just staring at the baby chicken

I promise he did not hurt the chicken!  All 10 of them are growing  nicely in the back of our shop in the Chicken Coop!  He is a future farms though if he wants to be!

The best reaction ever!

Hi baby Chick!  

My three miracles

Simply stunning - this is my daughter and I am blesssed!

Grandma and the grandchildren!

My stunning sister and her beautiful daughter!

A mama and her miracles

I love this boy!

Our Family

My kindhearted daughter

A father and his son

My sister's family

We had a vision for this picture yet it some how just was not going to work