Our shattered dreams are never random. They are always a piece in a larger puzzle, a chapter in a larger story.

Larry Crabb

Tuesday, November 4, 2008

Report Mess Ups And Other Stuff

Yesterday was my post surgery check up with my surgeon who is also my OBGYN. When I asked him what he all did while he was exploring around inside of me, because I was unable to make heads or tails of the report I was sent, he said that the hospital messed up and put a wrong report in my file. The report I was sent said that Dr. Upton tied my tubes. I got a little nervous at that point. However he reassured me that was not the case. In his notes that were transcribed clearly state that he inserted the needle into my ovaries numerous times and them used 35 watts of electricity (aka, ovarian drilling). I also asked him what the results of the dye test (HSG) where. He said he does not remember doing one on me. However with a messed up report he does not want to say one way or the other. So I have to call back next week when he has the hospital file in hand and we will decide from there what to do. Right now it is looking like I will have to have an HSG test done while I am fully awake. I was so hoping that I would not have to have this. However we will see. So frustrating.

On other stuff. I am having a rough go of it some days. My husband is so amazing, and yet he has so many questions right now. Questions that I struggle to answer. He is so patient with me, and wow since I told him everything he is also way more understanding. Yet I am still struggling. I want to email my counsellor, and she said I could anytime, and as often as I need too, and yet I keep telling myself that she would want me to be dependant on Jesus, and not on her. Which is true, she is always telling me to ask Jesus what He thinks or wants me to do. A good counsellor will not create dependency or him or her, because once the client leaves the office they have to go back to real life, and for some clients real life is pretty sucky.

My real life is hard right now because of needing to face the past to move onto the glorious future Jesus has for both Jeral and I. However outside of facing the hard stuff I have a pretty amazing life. A wonderful husband who loves and cherishes me, great friends, a wonderful home, financial security, so I have the time I need to work on this stuff. All in all I have a great life, a blessed life. I am just having a tough time taking in everything and getting everything out.

Oh well TIME. That is what I keep hearing time, give myself time. So I will!

1 comment:

Trev and Rebekah said...

Leanne, if you need a friend feel free to call any time. I'd love to listen and pray for you.
Sorry you might have to have the HSG. If you do, let me know and I will be praying for you. I guess you'd have to wait till next month for that?
Love ya!