Daddy Is Here

This morning after we had Kenzie and Jaris fed I went up stairs to take a shower, and when I left both babies were content and happy to be where they were at, however after I had gotten ready that was another story. I came out of our room to hear Jaris screaming up a storm, an yet it did not last long because I also heard Jeral in a tender, calm, reassuring voice gently say - "It is okay, Daddy is here. You are going to be okay Daddy is here. I am here." Jaris calmed down pretty quickly as his Daddy held him. As I walked down the stairs I realized that is God with us so often - when we are freaking out, screaming /crying over something - if only we could take a second and listen we would hear God say - "It is okay, your Abba is here. You are going to be okay Abba is here. I am here."

I love how my little babes and my husband give me tangible reminders of what our Father God is like with us!





Here is actual proof that Jaris does coo every now and then!




And well I have to post something of Kenzie also so here she is playing with and holding her bottle. She is growing up rather quickly. Too quickly for mommy - she likes water downed apple juice now! Oiy what are we getting into?

Kenzie Talking

Okay so I thought how fun would it be to video my girl playing with her bottle. We got some good shots of her actually picking the bottle up and putting it in her mouth, however when I actually had the camera right all she wanted to do is talk. Anyways this one is for both Grandma's, Grandpa, Auntie Lois, Auntie Marie, Auntie Joy, and anyone else who reads/stalks this blog!

Pretty Little Girl in the Mirror

Okay so I had to take Kenzie into the washroom the other day so I put her in the Bumbo and gave her a toy to play with, however I did not need to give her a toy, she fell in love with herself in the mirror! Seriously I let her sit there for 15 minutes and she would not look at anything else even when I tried to get her attention. She knows she is one good looking little girl!

Just to make things clear I have no intention of stopping with the blog, I was just ranting a bit yesterday! The reality is that our blog is my journal of our family as we grow, and Caroline I totally agree that maybe we need to just get together since we do not live that far away! And Ashlea yes lets get together when you are out here in June! I love communicating this way :)

Two Months

My two month old little boy! He sure is adorable!

His little cute smile! I love it when he smiles and coos, he favorite time to smile is just after kisses from mommy and hey I love giving out kisses to my little miracles.

Taking a short little nap. I went to put him down for some tummy time and he zonked right out. I guess tummy time will happen later!

Little miss adorable! She just finished eating her yummy oat apple cereal and then downed a 4 oz bottle, before pictures! Seriously her smile and her laugh are the best.

Tummy time on the play mat! Kenzies tummy time went better than Jaris'. I think she will soon be crawling.

Wow I have a two month old today! A two month old and a 5 month old! Where has time gone? We are truly blessed and we love our children so very much! Well there is the update for today.

I love getting to post updates for family and friends so they can watch our miracles growing up, and yet there is a part of me who is starting to think maybe I should stop with the updates, so if family and friends really want an update then they can call to find out. As much as technology is great for keeping people update in ways that never would have happened before, technology can be rather impersonal also. For example I have long lost relatives who read our family's blog and I only found out now which is awesome because they would not get to watch our children grow up, and yet I also have close friends who just go to the blog to get the update instead. Now as much as I am spouting off about this I am totally guilty of this too. Sorry Tara, Dom, Janelle, Trina, Rebs, and even Marie (however with you we talk more than there are updates) I could call you however I just read the blog the instead. Hmm, maybe I should just email and get your ph # so I can call. Even facebook makes it possible to know what is going on in someones life without ever having to talk to them. I enjoy getting to know what is going on in the lives of former campers/co-workers, and fellow Bible College friends, yet really 468 friends - and how many do I really talk too? Anyways this is just something I have been thinking about over the last few days!

Shots and Thoughts

Chow time for Kenzie - she is loving eating rice, oatmeal, and barley cereal! She is growing up way to fast!

Going on a walk with daddy and sitting on his shoulders! I love watching Jeral with our children - he truly is an amazing daddy!!!!!

Holding his sister's finger! Some days they get along great and then other days putting them together just does not work! Oh well they are brother and sister for life so they will just have to get used to being together, and sharing mommy and daddy!

So both my beautiful babes had shots today! I think I am more traumatized then they are. Both Kenzie and Jaris did really well. Kenzie weighed in today at 15 lbs and 7 oz. Way to go little girl!!!!!!! Jaris weighed in at 14 lbs and 5 oz. He is 3 months younger and only about a pound less!!!!! He is catching up and fast.

So to my thoughts. For the past few months I have purposefully stayed away from posting anything to theological simply because this is an open blog and I know that I have friends and family who do not see things or believe things the way that I do. However today I am breaking away from that.

Last night Kenzie and I went for a walk and as we were walking I was telling Kenzie all about how God created the universe and we got to talking about Adam and Eve and how they ate from the one tree they were not allowed to, and what all happened as a result of that - getting kicked out of the garden, their physical bodies one day dying, and no longer getting to walk and talk with God face to face (in my humble opinion this was the worst consequence). I told her that is how sin entered the world and because of that we all are born with sin etc., and then I went on to tell her about Jesus and how Jesus is the son of God yet also God and how confusing this probably one day will be fore her and yet hopefully she will sort of get it one day maybe, however I am 31 and still am not sure how to wrap my brain around it so I just take it on faith. I then told her that Jesus died on a cross because of our sin, and then I stopped - because I do not believe that - WHAT you may be thinking - i know to some reading this I am a heathen for saying that. Just bare with me and you will understand where I am coming from. You may not agree with me however that is okay, the world would be pretty boring if we all agreed on everything.

A couple months ago we were singing a song in church and the one of the lines goes like this "it was my sin that held Him there until it was accomplished." I stopped singing and thought that is a pile of B.S. Yes I am sinful however it was not my sin that held Jesus on the cross, it was not even my sin that put him there. It was his love for me that put him on the cross and held him there. Jesus could have called on the hosts of Heaven to rescue Him, yet he did not, and the only reason He did not was because He LOVES me. If God did not love me Jesus would never have left Heaven to come to earth. Jesus would not have let himself be whipped, beaten, spit on, and humiliated the way He did if He did not love me. God loves me and God loves my children so as I talk and teach my children about God I am not going to focus on the sin aspect. Will I talk about it? Yes a bit, however that WILL NOT be our focus as parents when we are talking and sharing with our children about God, our focus will be His LOVE, His GRACE, and His MERCY. I am finding more and more with having children that my belief systems are being challenged. The truth is as I share with them despite them being so young I am not going to scare them into Heaven, I would rather love them into Heaven. In my own personal walk love has motivated me way more and in truer way than fear.

Okay enough rambling for now!

Just some Pictures

Our Beautiful little Girl! Daddy decided one Sunday morning that it would be fun to put her in the Bumbo and let her play while he was reading the news paper outside and well who could pass up a picture of this cutie! She definitely suits the meaning of her name "Radiant Joyful One." She has a smile that can and does light up a whole room.

Daddy and Jaris both zonked out! My poor boys are both sick and Jaris is extra snuggly these days. Here is hoping Jeral and Jaris feel better soon. This cold thing hit Jeral and Jaris pretty hard.

Kenzie does this cute little lick of her lips and sucking noise when she sees us eating, and she is only 5 months. Actually she is five months today! So seeing as she like food so much or so she thinks - I thought this was a great picture of her trying to get to the food I was preparing for supper the other night.

Jaris taking a turn in the bumbo! Our little boy is pretty floppy still so I try to every day do things with him that will help to strengthen his neck muscles. The reality is he is a big boy and he has a big head so it may take a little while longer for him to hold his head up. He has started to smile every now and then and sometimes he coos. It is totally adorable to see him starting to do this. I have to remember that every child develops at his or her own pace.

Last Home Visit

One of the steps in adopting is having an after placement home visit, and we had ours today. This visit was relatively short and painless in comparison to the homestudy we did before we got Kenzie. Today's visit went well and now all we have to do is wait for the write up which in a little over a month our lawyer can present to the supreme court and our adoption of Kenzie can be finalized. I look forward to the day that we have all the paperwork confirming that we are Kenzie's parents forever. Then we will have the papers to confirm what is already in our hearts. We are Kenzie's mommy and daddy.

Last night was long, as Jeral is sick so I let him sleep, while both Kenzie and Jaris took turns crying. Thank you Jesus that they took turns crying and there was not a time when both were crying. As I was holding my babies I was decided that I want to enjoy all the cuddles and snuggles while I can. Reality is they will not want to snuggle and cuddle for ever. One day they will have spouses and children of their own (hopefully because I want to be a grandma and this is all about me after all !). The years of little sleep will be relatively short compared to the years that I will get to sleep at night, so I am not going to push my little ones to grow up to fast. They are my little babies and I want to allow them to be babies who want to be held, snuggled, feed, played with, sung to, and loved much. Well that is all for my thinking for now! Off on a walk to town with my miracles I go!

A Sick Family

Well I am up way earlier in the morning that I want to be, however that is life with wee little ones, and especially when everyone in the family is sick. Jeral has been sick for a week now with very little sign of improvement. I would say he is actually getting worse, so I am up today at 5 am with both kids. Kenzie has also been sick since Monday last week (nice holidays huh!), and Jaris since Thursday. I hate laying in bed at night and listening to my son choke on his own snot and have that wake him up. My heart as a mommy breaks not being able to help my children feel better. At least I can be thankful that I got over it rather quickly so I can take care of my family.

On the upside to a short night I know I did get some sleep because I had a funny dream. In three plus years of going to Abbotsford I never missed an appointment, however in my dream we were all in a school and my best buds were there too, and I somehow managed to miss 2 appointments, so the Joy club leader paid me back by making me play some strange version of twister in one of those sort of welcome to school game days (we used to have days like that at Bethany Bible College when I was there). Seriously twister she could not think of anything better?!?!?!? Hahaha - I know it was my dream thus my subconscious put it all together the way it did. It was still funny though, and I got to see my friends and have adult conversations despite it being only in my dreams!

Well I need to go swaddle one miracle, and play with the other while eating my breakfast all before the dr.'s office opens and I am able to call in and make appointments for the kids. This has gone on long enough!

Our Little Get Away

the kids with Aunt Sue

my beautiful little girl

Kenzie and her cousin Jaydn

attempting to have them sleep side by side

Jaris sort of smiling still not sure what to do with his older sister

Well we are back home from our week long trip! We had 20 days off in between cycles so we decided to take the kids to Abbotsford, Langley, and Vancouver. It was great to see family and friends! Some days I wish we lived down there, and yet I know then i would miss my friends here, however the reality is no one can replace Marie, so I would move there just to be closer to her.

So here is the run down of our trip! Friday we got to go hang out with my friend Misty and spend the night at her home. It was nice to catch up a bit even though the time was short.

Saturday we went to she our Aunt Sue in the mid morning! Then in the afternoon we went to hang out with Marie, Andrew and our friend Trina as well as her youngest son. Once again the time was short and yet it was good. I miss Marie and really do wish we lived in Abbotsford some days so my kids could grow up with Auntie Marie around. Then it was off to the hotel.

Seriously staying in a hotel with two little ones is an adventure. All 4 of us in the same room - well we used to do that, however not anymore for sleep reasons. Kenzie and Jeral both sleep better if Kenzie does not have to hear Jaris making all sorts of noises!

Sunday was just relaxing. We went on a walk around the Discovery Trail area. Before that we went out for brunch. Both Kenzie and Jaris slept the whole time. In the evening we went to church. I think the reality is for both Jeral and I we will not be able to sit and listen or enjoy church until our miracles are a little older. Right now we just focus on them and try to keep them happy and content.

Sunday was also Mother's Day and my first one as a Mother. I will admit I did tear up a few times as I thought about how amazing both my children are and how precious they are. I love them both so much and am not able to imagine life without them now. I am blessed, I was blessed before them, and I am blessed with them in my life.

Monday we went to visit our my friend Lorie in the morning and then we made our way to Vancouver and Jeral's sister's house. Jeral, Kenzie and I also got sick that day - thank you lack of sleep - however I got better quickly and Jeral and Kenzie are still recovering.

Tuesday I got to hang out with another dear friend who is soon going to have her little bundle of joy! And she got to meet and hold my little (okay not so little) bundles of joy.

Wednesday was hanging out with Jeral's sister since she had the day off. I almost told Jeral I wanted to see my former therapist as a therapist (instead of as the kid's auntie) that day if she had any free slots since he would have help with the kids, however in the end I decided against that.

Thursday we headed home.

Now today is trying to get things cleaned up. We have a ton of laundry, and bottles to sterilize, and I am taking care of the kids by myself today - this is the first time that I have had them all by myself for the whole day and I have been at home for most of it. Right now both are napping so I can write this. I think I am am doing pretty good and I have not stuffed my face full of food to calm my anxiety so that is a good sign.

We still are muddling through Jaris' feeding issues. He is still constipated, spits up (today was some amazing projectile puke), and sounds congested all the time. Thus nights are hard. Last night he woke up every 90 minutes to feed yet only took an ounce, thus he was not hungry he was soothe feeding. Well I have to finish the final touches on supper before the kids wake up, and maybe fold some laundry!

Dr.'s Check Up

Sorry no pictures with this post! Just a short one today .

Jaris had a 6 week check up and he is in the 90th percentile for weight and head circumference, and the 97th percentile for height! He is taking after daddy. At less than a month and a half Jaris weighs what Kenzie weighed at 3 months! As for his pooping issues and puking issues the Dr. thinks they are linked and if we can get his bowel movements softer then he won't have to push so hard and then he may stop spitting up all the time. So we are trying a low iron formula. I had wanted a lactose free low iron formula however so far I have been unable to find one. So just low iron for now.

Well that is it for now - lots to do to get ready for our trip tomorrow! Packing for 4 takes a lot of prep and planning!

Rough Nights

Me multitasking feeding two children at once!

Coming home from a walk! Walking is the best way to get them to sleep and let mommy get some exercise. I love how cute they look. We still need to get the second sling for Kenzie, however since I am not jogging for nice easy strolls she can sit in the regular seat!

My attempt to get them used to each other in the hopes that they will help each other self sooth the way twins do. This is going to be a process so I am going to spend time putting them in the same crib everyday for a little bit. Funny looking at this picture even though Kenzie is 3 months older than Jaris there does not appear to be much of a size difference right now!

The last few nights with Jaris have been pretty rough to say the least. He cries, and cries, and cries (okay more like screams) when he is not being held, all he seems to want to do is eat a lot and frequently especially at night, he coughs lots (yet is not sick with a cold), and spits up tons. We did change his formula so it would help with other gastrointestinal issues, however we are at a loss as to what is going on with our little boy. Good thing he and I have doctor's appointments this week Thursday. My heart hurts for him, and I really do not like not knowing how to help my little boy feel better. Well I guess I do in some ways and that is just to hold him all the time, however then I do not get time with MacKenzie, or time to sleep and that makes for a cranky zombie mom! With that being said maybe I should nap since Jeral is with Jaris and I Kenzie is napping!

Jaris and our Family!

I love his feet with the big bouncy ball in the background.

My boy! Just relaxing and sort of sleeping! He is one of the greatest gifts in the world as well as his sister!

Chilling in a basket with some stuffies and his Little Miracle Blanket. The Blanket was his "cousin" Josiah's blanket. Josiah was truly a miracle and now he is with Jesus, so Josiah's mommy gave me Josiah's blanket because Jaris is one of our two little Miracles, and when the time is right the blanket will go back to Marie for her next little miracle!

Still Chilling!

Tiny hands that have mommy wrapped around his little finger!

Handsome Feet! I love how cute little feet look and my son's are prefect!

There had to be a teddy bear picture and he looks so thoughtful here I think we have a philosopher on our hands - or really anything he wants to be. He could also be relaxed because we had just changed his diaper!

I love how we actually got one with his legs tucked under him. We tried this with Kenzie and she had a mind of her own.

Jeral and I laughed so hard when we saw this one. They both have a similar look on their faces as if to say we are not impressed about being placed in a basket of toys.

However then this happened! Kenzie smiled and laughed! Seriously her smiles and laughs make any hard day melt away! My children are the best part of everyday (as well as the hardest, yet the smiles make that all go away)!

Me and my boy! If I appear to be glowing that is because I am radiant with love for both my daughter and son!

Our Family! First family photo with the 4 of us!

We had to have one with us kissing, and I know for a fact Daddy was happy to actually have a moment to kiss! Funny story when I hold Kenzie and kiss Jeral, Kenzie looks at us and then grabs at my face and his face as if to say "hey I want in on this", so then we both kiss her on the cheek and she giggles. Gotta love that - at least we love that!